Right now, there is one thing on everybody’s mind and that is the election. And that’s a good thing; this election will affect our lives more than any other election in recent memory. We should care a lot about this presidential election and the many crucial down-ballot races. But what I really want to talk about right now is how I just got hit by a car.
Listen, I know you can read a lot of metaphors into this post but I promise that there is nothing political here. As I laid bleeding on the concrete watching the Hyundai sonata drive away, I made sure to note both the license plate number and the lack of any political bumper stickers. You could maybe make some assumptions about the driver based on the area and the price tag of the vehicle but those would unfair to the driver who just left me to die on this secluded country road.
It feels really weird to think about myself right now when the fate of everyone hangs in the balance but I must ask if some of you could maybe shift your focus towards my situation for a bit. Not a whole lot. Just between two and four medical professionals who can quickly address the red haze currently engulfing my field of vision. But they can keep their phones on in case something goes down with the election.
Update: Shortly after publication, in a preplanned live message to his supporters, President Donald Trump referenced my injury with “This liberal reporter. You hear about this? He’s walking in the middle of the road out in the middle of nowhere. I don’t know why. Maybe drugs but I’m not going to say that. And we’re supposed to feel sorry for this guy. Give me a break.”
FUCK YOU DONALD TRUMP. This is now a political post.
VOTE JOE BIDEN.
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