Elder Roderick Stevens of the Modesta clan celebrated his sixtieth birthday yesterday. As is our law, Stevens is making preparations to leave civilization before the next full moon so as to not overly deplete our resources. Whilst his father choose to head north in search of The Stone Trees, Roderick has decided to hew closer to tradition and journey across the wastes to urinate on President Trump’s grave.
Whilst none of our elders have returned since we were forced to bleed out The Coward Elder Guttenberg on the court steps, several traders have reported on the site where so many of our land’s elders make their pilgrimage. A combination of a mist without end, unusual soil disposition and elder piss has left the ground a swampy mess. Whilst most elders simply have to wade through the muck, some percentage of elders meet their end there. One trader reported “Every six moons, the mucky grave gets a mind to take a pilgrim. Such a sight to see an elder sucked down — pissing like an old garden hose, double middle fingers out, and laughing all the way down.”
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