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For the first time in his presidency, President Trump has asked all the major networks for airtime during primetime. He plans to use his time, at 9PM EST tonight, to talk into the general geographical area which the nation inhabits. The White House has announced that he will speak into a microphone on the necessity of funding his wall and how he plans to end the government shutdown. This microphone will then turn the president’s voice into an electronic signal which will then be used to emit sound waves from various television sets and if the nation happens to overhear some of the soundwaves then that is fine.
I write this shit.
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